Ok Ok... I have been horrible at this. blogging thing. I am not going to make excuses but my old sponsor was not too into the whole "technology" thing when I am a "techy" kind of girl. New Sponsor? (you might be asking). I shoulda seen the headlights coming like at the end of a tunnel but I guess I was hoping things would be fine. We are still friends and all but she said I was not giving her anything. What am I supposed to give? Was I not honest enough? I am hard to get close to. I don't know what happened so I will call it a God thing and moved on. She helped save my life in the beginning. My main reason, at the beginning of my sobriety, for drinking was that I was not a good mother which I have moved past for the most part. I still think I was the best mother I could be and I am raising a son who seems to have suffered no permanent damage from me LOL. At one meeting I was feeling strange that I had not been an active drug or booze user for very long. It was off and on for 4 years and most people have drank for a while and I said that my crazy life started way before I picked up a drink. My unmanagables as I call them. My new sponsor picked up on this and I have listened to her for quite a while. She has many years of sobriety (that was not my main need), but she has a counseling in this field and she loves the Lord which is very important for me.
SOOOOOO for all you reading this I am going to do my VERY best at being consistant with my blog as I think this is theraputic. But I have a cool new workbook through my counselor that I want to work on and share on here. So I will start again with step 1 (for the workbooks sake LOL). 1 year and 1 month sober and I am going back to step one. Oh well. Since I lost my job I should find plenty of time to blog. I hope. 4 year olds have their own agenda.
God bless and Good Night
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
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